It’s great we can connect with our grandparents. I remember one day vividly, it was autumn time, I was hanging out with my grandma and we ate lunch, a simple salad with chicken, together at her dining room table, and all was silent, mostly — no music or phones– and she pulls out her newspaper to read it, and we are conversing – it all is simple – but still it was so new to me. It was so new to me because it was not a quick meal, we did not have phones with us, there was no constant simulation, impatience in waiting for the meal, there was no urge to quickly get all the food in my mouth, there was no “Now, now, I need it now,” in my head. There was none of that. And I remember, glimpsing at her, the salad bowl in front of me, having yet to eat, thinking, “Wow this is nice,” and, “Why have I not thought of this sooner?” It is a basic thing – just having a meal – but I cherished it quite a lot and I really remember wanting to operate this way all the time. Just a simple meal, cooking, then eating, that’s all.
But I was born in a generation of instant gratification, scrolling, dopamine bursts, short attention spans. It all feels very chaotic, to be in this realm. It all feels like back and forth, whiplash, in a way. Always looking for a quick hit. In this realm I cannot simply eat – I need the TV on, or music playing, or my phone in hand to scroll on Instagram reels.
This is the importance of cross generations. She was born in a time that allows for something like this — a simple meal. And we can get together, in the present moment, and share a meal together — she can share with me the way things have been. I was not caught in my realm, I was able to enter hers.
I think this is the case for a lot of life. Not just sharing perspectives across generations, but sharing perspectives across cultures and religions. Different people have shown me different things, and I am so grateful for it, because otherwise, I would be stuck where I am, blind to how things could be better. I, in this case, would be unable to appreciate a meal for a meal, unable to get through the irritation, wanting to grab my phone, wanting the chicken to hurry up and cook, or wanting a bit of a cookie before the meal. I did resist those urges, in the end, because my grandma didn’t have them and we were at her house. Because of this I could sit at the table when I was done in peace, in stillness, not needing to rush to find another quick reward.
Photo by Diane Picchiottino on Unsplash
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